From 2012- I still feel this way. I’m glad that in late 2014 I decided to start exercising and walking. It’s helped my physical well being a lot:
The forecast is for beautiful days over the next week. Many of us are going to be able to get out and work in the yard, take a walk, enjoy a cup of coffee on the patio or the porch and watch the gorgeous sunrises and sunsets.
We have so much. I am trying my very best to concentrate on all these good things which I have been given and not dwell on the things which are not so good.
I want more than anything to spend more time with my family. I realized yesterday while watching two of my granddaughters at a Band concert that it was just a blink of an eye ago when they were babies…toddlers, preschool. Now, one is going into High School next year.
I cannot do the things I used to do. I tried to work a little in the yard yesterday and almost made myself sick. Physical work is out of my ability to perform as I want to, because of my limitations.
But perhaps my heart was changed beyond what they did to repair it, while I laid there without a heart beat for 40 minutes. I think it changed my needs. I can let the grass grow long, and the bushes go untrimmed and the digging left undug in exchange for being able to love my family.
Our creator’s gift which came along with my infirmity was time…that most precious thing, and the ability to use it to love, that most divine thing. I am thankful. Never let anything that I say convince you otherwise.
In all of human history there has been no time like now. The only thing which sometimes bothers me is the tiny shiver which runs up my spine thinking about where “now” is.
We live in a world where smart humans have subjected the other 98% of we less technical and scientific “normal” humans to such dangers as nuclear weapons, nuclear power plants, overuse of chemical agents for war, agriculture and insecticides, massive military forces, industrial pollution, poison industrial byproducts, germ warfare, and political strife over land ownership by countries and individuals.
As on of my friends stated just yesterday, homo sapiens may be the very first species to precipitate its own extinction. It’s a sobering and distressing thought. There has never been a time like now.
A time of practically instant communication. A time of world travel which is so quick, that there is no longer a real sovereignty of nations. A time when human knowledge has outpaced our capabilities and the morality of the human psyche to be able to exercise constraint in our dealings with one another, so we therefore treat each other badly.
We are at a crossroads where the spiritual part of humanity’s brain must be nurtured and nursed into a state where a deeper and more compassionate conscious develops. We have to somehow develop a system of learning which fosters the responsibility for our existence faster than our capacity for self destruction. How do we do this?
We turn the keys of power over to the new generation of young leaders who are rapidly developing not only in America, but all over the world. Our children and grandchildren who are anxious to overcome the problems this generation has created, and to create a more harmonious world. They are out there, and we must step out of their way, and demand this generations crop of old and dishonest leaders move out and give the new crop time to grow. It won’t be easy, but I believe it’s our best chance.
Otherwise turn out the lights, the parties over.