Month: August 2018

I now have the cleanest squirrel in the State of Georgia living in the tree in my front yard. The bold little feller is a permanent resident of the Ivy encased Elm tree that stands on the West side of the house providing much needed evening shade. I water my plants regularly and refresh the water in the birdbaths every day or so, and I use a hose pipe with a “sweeper” nozzle so I can get out to the farthest reaches of my postage stamp size yard. I was over next to the fence, just fixing to quit when the “dirty” little squirrel climbed down off his limb onto the top of one of my birdhouses. Seeing that he needed a bath, I screwed the nozzle to “high” which produces the strongest stream of water possible. Pointed the hose in his direction and let go of the crimp in the hose pipe I had been holding. Now..I’ve seen squirrels make some amazing moves…they are quite acrobatic creatures, but when that stream of water hit that little bushy tailed rodent he did a double back flip with three and a half turns straight UP onto the limb above his head. It took him two more seconds to get back up to his home base…where he sat chattering and shaking like a wet dog. Well..now he’s clean and I ain’t seen him trying to rob the poor finches today…..

Ok…all you folks who work at fast food restaurants at the windows….the phrase is: “Sorry you had to wait” NOT “Sorry ABOUT your wait…(weight??) The first time someone said this to me…I thought they musta’ noticed my big belly going through Wendy’s to get ANOTHER large Frosty. Well….after losing some of the belly I belatedly realized they were trying to apologize for their untimeliness in getting me my “fast” food, after only a 15 minute weight. I really got the message one day when a little lady brought my bag of Chicken out to the truck and says: “Sorry about your weight…” and I said in return: “Well..I’m sorry that you’re short!” After she glared at me and stomped off I figured I would quit trying to get the point across in a “comedic” way. In any case…if you’ve had this phrase used on you, well just tell the person…”hey, I ain’t THAT heavy..”

The song I have always loved above all others is “Somewhere over the Rainbow”.

I remember the first time I ever heard it. That was in 1956 on CBS. Judy Garland sang that song, and I knew I would never forget it. It’s one of the few thrilling things I remember from that year.

I do remember pulling one of those extra large ’56 Mantle cards from a bubble gum pack. Wish I still had it.

My favorite line from over the Rainbow: “Somewhere over the rainbow, skies are blue….and the dreams that we dare to dream really do come true”.

….dare to dream
…dreams come true.

I’m a weird old man. A lot of friends and relatives don’t mind letting me know that fact.

But…I love that song, and its message off hope in a seemingly hope starved world.

Went to Trade Day again today. Been going there pretty regularly since they first started it, back down at the “Triangle Shopping Center” in Trion. It was a REAL Trade Day back then…with people actually “trading” for things…mostly knives, and even guns back in those days, guess it was the late 70’s. The owner there didn’t much care for it, so it moved to it’s current location down between Trion and Summerville. All these years since, I have been looking for the “Holy Grail” of Trade Day…otherwise know as “the great find” “the treasure” i.e. the one thing that will worth SO much money that I will be able to sell it at Christie’s or Sotheby’s for a cool million and live in the life of luxury from there on out. Only problem is, I have never found it… Oh, I have found some pretty good “STUFF” over the years. I’ve brought a lot of that “stuff” or “high class junk” home. My wife is pretty good about it. She let’s me bring it in the house and hardly says a word about it. Kinda’ Saintly really, considering some of the weird things I have thought were “treasures” over the years. I won’t go into detail about that right now…only to say that I owe her a lot of thanks for her patience. Being the wife of a “junker” is not an easy thing. I have found everything from oil paintings to deer antlers, I have found Japanese pottery, and Chinese statues. Pocket knives and Buddha’s. Baseball cards aplenty!! Old marbles, toys, books, clothes, cameras, military items, rings, and earrings, stamps, postcards, old letters, arrowheads, rocks …you name it, and I have bought it. I’ve found things that I thought were worth thousands…and it turned out they were worthless. I have got somethings for a quarter or fifty cents and sold them for more. But that elusive treasure, that Holy Grail, it’s still out there. One thing I have found though is a lot of friends. I have met people who would give you the shirt off of their back if you needed it. I have met people at Trade day who I count as some of my closest friends. People you can trust. I know some of these people, who would go five miles out of their way to pay you the dollar they owed your from last week. People who let you sit on the back of their truck and look through hundreds of dollars worth of stuff while they go about their business, or go to the bathroom or get a snack,..because they trust YOU. People like me…who are chasing that “Holy Grail” Some days, like today…it gets tiring to hunt it. I have plowed through more boxes of junk than most people will ever see, hunched over..prodding through the bottom, looking for that 22 karat gold necklace that weights a pound, or that undiscovered Picasso, or Van Gogh. Back hurting…sweat dripping..or freezing to death….I am there looking for it. One day it’s going to be there, and I won’t EVER have to go back to Trade Day again. One day… Anway, on Saturday if it’s not raining it’s back to the chase…

A story I was listening to on NPR today really caught my attention. It was about a blind man named Daniel Kish who lost both of his eyes to cancer as a young child. One would expect…yes a person’s expectation would be that this child would lead a sheltered and protected life. A life where his parents would protect him and seek to keep him from being harmed due to his “disability” But, Daniel Kish himself had differenct expectations for his life. He expected to be able to do things that normal sighted people could do.

He developed a system of his own, using vocal clicks as he moved about, in order to locate things around him. As he grew he became more adept at finding his way using this unique sonar system. He came to be able to do things that any normal sighted person could do. He rides a bycycle anywhere he wants to go. He can identifiy items exactly, using his sonar system. The main part of his philosopy is that he is not bound by other people’s expectations of what he, a blind man, should be. He essentially became a real “Batman”.

Therein lies the idea which made me think and reconsider expectations.

Our first set of the expectations are from our parents. We are guided into the precepts of their own expectations for us. Kids are expected to play sports, or to be involved in some way. We must keep our kids busy doing the things we expect a child of their age, in their environment, to do. If a child asks to do something out of the ordinary, we sometimes tell them they “can’t do” that. “Momma I want to be an artist”. You can’t do that…your too little. “Daddy, I want to be a writer”. Son, you know we’re already doing football. “Mom and Dad, I want to be the person who cures cancer”. “Mom and Dad, I want to discover how to exceed the speed of light”. Say what?

Then there are the limitations we put on ourselves about our abilities. “I want to be a writer…publish a book”. What you talking about boy…your 65 years old…an old man!”

“I want to start a new chapter in my life, I want to live to 100 years old, I want to discover new possibilities for my life that I never thought possible!” Everything is possible if we believe we can exceed our expectations. Contrary to a popular myth which says we only us 10% of our brains, we humans use practically every part of our brain. What we do not do is expect success which exceeds our wildest expectations.

We should never sell ourselves short. We certainly should not put limitations on the expectations of our family.

We should not only expect them, and ourselves to be Batman, we should expect Superman.

Sometimes I know when I am seriously in thought I probably don’t look too friendly. I may appear to be scowling, but I’m not…believe me. My mind wanders like a greased pig on slick ice. I’m all over the place. I can’t seem to concentrate on over one thing at a time anymore. I might say “uh-huh” and didn’t understand a word you said. Part of it might be my hearing. I was “borderline” on the last hearing test I took before I left work. Probably the results of a LOT of noisy factories, and some loud Garth Brooks concerts. (That one in B’ham got me…I couldn’t hear normally for three weeks!) OR it could just be selective hearing. Nevertheless, please don’t think me rude..I can’t seem to help it.

I’m praying for a lot of friends tonight. There’s a lot who need it. I hope some pray for me too. Regardless of the fact that I quit going to Church regular, I ain’t lost my religion, my humanity, or my philosophy of life which is live and let live, give when you can, what you can and care about all life big and small.

Perhaps I am getting old because I appear to ramble. Anyway, if I walk by you with my head down and a blank look on my face just holler “hey” and that will get my attention and we will talk. I like you…believe me I really do….I wouldn’t have it any other way.

I don’t get to take my wife out near as often as she deserves, but we did get take in lunch and a movie this past week. It was “Guardians of the Galaxy” a very fun flic.

I always notice how comfortable and secure I feel in a theatre. Guess almost all of us my age and a little older get that warmth. For me, it all stems from being “movie goer” since….well I can’t remember how long ago. I still remember walking from our house on Simmons street in 1959 to watch the cowboy movies at the old Trion Cinema. What a wonderful place that was.

Mom and Dad never thought a thing about letting a 9 year old boy walk by himself to the “show” back then. Something parents are more careful about nowadays.

So when I would sink down in those old deep cushioned chairs back then it was a wonderful feeling.

That’s never ever gone away, not in all those 54 years since. Even now, just as soon as the movie starts, I’m magically transported away from the reality of who I am and what’s bothering me, to whatever world is on that huge screen. From Roy Rogers, to Clark Gable and Vivian Leigh in GWTW. From “2001” to “Star Wars” and “LOTR” Saw a lot of movies I loved, some I hated, and some I was just downright indifferent to…

I know a lot of people wait for movies to be released to the “home screen” but it’s just not the same. I’m not so sure about this 3D thing though. If I had wanted to be IN the movie I woulda auditioned! I guess it’s kinda fun though.

We are living in the golden age of mankind right now. Despite what you hear, despite what some would like you to think, humans are better off in all aspects of life now than at any point in history.

The only other era which could even come close was the most austere days of the Roman Republic…even over the so called “Pax Romana” because even during that time Rome was ruled by a dictator.

If humanity were not living in our greatest age ever, there would certainly be fewer of us! Our health is better. A smaller percentage of us die from war and famine. We are better educated. Our food and homes are better. Etcetera. Oh, there are still many who require help…but the many could assist the few if they had a mind to do it, coupled with a compassionate, giving spirit.

We are all in the midst of an instant communication age with no constraints to prevent even the most blatant of lies from being told…and believed by many.

Certain people and groups want us all to live in fear. Fear of the unknown. Fear of those who are different. Fear of pain or death. Death will come to us all, but in it’s own time. We cannot let the fear of it paralyze us.

Refuse to listen to the fear-mongers and hate sowers. Live with at least a little optimism that there will be a tomorrow for us, and for our children and grandchildren.

Let us not become self fulfilling prophecy “pawns” for the chess-masters of chaos who bombard us with their doomsday BS day in and day out. Reject them. It’s in your power to do so.

I think the biggest fear of dying, at least in my mind is the basic human fear that almost all of us grow up with….fear of the dark.  Not just the dark as in a darkened room…but the dark as in the total absence of light of any kind.  It’s a scary thing to me.  To be conscious and in total darkness and not be able to do anything about it….

That’s terrifying to me.

I’ve had it happen to me on one occasion.  Back in my first year of college, the first time I ever went caving.  We used carbide lamps back then.  A carbide lamp is a two chambered light where calcium carbide is placed in the lower chamber and water in the top chamber.  The water is set to drip down on the CaC2, and produces acetylene gas, which comes up through the burner mechanism and is lit to produce light and a bit of heat.  They’ve been using these types of lamps in mines and caves for a long time.

We had tiny ones affixed to the front of our helmets, and with the reflectors behind them, they produced a fair amount of light.

I was the last one coming out of a small cave we were in on Pigeon mountain, and I got a little behind the rest of the group…not a long way, but just dragging behind like I sometimes do.  My gas ran out on my light and the light went out.  I was still about 50 or 60 feet inside the cave and no light penetrated down that far.  The darkness was as total as I have ever experienced.  All I had to do was to yell really loud, and the two other guys who were with me came quickly back down.  It was only about five minutes.  I’d hate to have been there any longer than that.

I don’t know if I could survive the ordeal of the two boys who discovered Linville Caverns in North Carolina.  Legend has it that they got 600 feet down into that cave using only an oil lamp, which they broke.  This was around 1900 or so.  It took them two days to find their way back out by following a little creek.

I guess the first thing we see after coming through our Mother’s birth canal is the light.  Usually bright lights in some hospital  OBGYN ward nowadays.  Probably less than that back in the old days, but always moving towards some type of light. After that, unless there is some type of vision impairment, we are around light every day of the rest of our lives.  Light is everything.  It is the sustainer of life.  Without it, life as we know it would cease to exist.

In our modern world light has become pretty pervasive.  It’s hard to get totally away from light nowadays, even if you try.  I opened my eyes last night as I lay in bed trying to sleep and saw little lights coming from all around.  Little digital lights on the DVD and the TV which are in our room, and a tiny red light on our TV receiver.  The Fitbit I wear lights up when I move around, and the phone I have which lays on the side table next to my bed, will light up at a touch.  Last weekend when I went outside late at night to try and see some meteors, I had to move to the South side of our patio, because all of the ambient light coming from the City of Chattanooga and the Airport just north of us were so bright they lit up the night sky to the north.  In a way, it’s aggravating, but in another way, it is comforting.  You know you are still alive, when you open your eyes at night and look around you and see all the tiny lights.

I suppose that my focus….some might say my obsession with sunrises and sunsets has to do with my love of light, and what it does to the world around me.  I’ve always been fascinated by the light at those times of day.  It plays with the world in such delicate ways, and sometimes in such extreme and colorful ways. It all depends on the factors and conditions in our atmosphere.  I love to capture some of these moments with a camera, as anyone who knows me can attest….to capture these striking and sometimes marvelous moments in time in perpetuity, to enjoy later and to share with other human beings, my contemporaries, who are inhabiting this place now at the same time as me. There is not much that I can do in this world to try and bring a little bit of joy or gladness, but those captured moments in time are an effort on my part.

That brings me back to where I started.  What happens when we die?

I am not sure.  Nobody is sure.  With the exception of some religious figures, nobody has ever come back from the dead to tell us what happens after we breath our last breath.

I have read of people who have “near death” experiences who talk about moving towards the light when they “die”, only to be pulled back to this side in order to go on living this human life.  Their descriptions of what lays beyond are comforting to be sure.

I’m not stressed about it all the time, but it’s a concerning thing.  It’s something that has always lurked in the periphery of my subconscious and sometimes comes bursting to the surface at unexpected times.

People of faith will say that they will see the light of the world once they cross over.  Some talk of heavenly cities with streets of gold.

Of all of these things I ponder and wonder.  These years I have spent in the light have been wonderful, marvelous and glorious.  What more could any being ask then to be able to live in the warmth and light of the Universe and to love and hold onto those around them?

If there is nothing beyond here except for a lasting and eternal peace of blissful non existence, it will still have been so worth it to have been here.

Going through things trying to decide: keep, sell, give away?

I come across a hot wheels container with multiple used…some well used, toy die cast cars. I recognize some of them. They are left overs from pre 1987, when we lived at 35 9th street. They belonged to Teddy and Matthew.

I posted a few weeks ago about finding all my tax returns from way back in the day. In 1982 through 1987 we were a one paycheck family, and it wasn’t anything to brag about dollar wise. But we got by.

However, every payday I’d take the kids to the store for a toy. Most of the time the boys bought hot wheels. More bang for the buck at .99 cents each. I can’t remember exactly what Kisi got…by 1987 it was probably teen magazine, with Menudo, Cyndi Lauper and Madonna pictures.

But the boys pretty much stuck to the hot wheels during that era. I can’t tell you how many times I’d clean up their room and put stuff into their big old basketball shaped toy box, and there would be dozens of hot wheels in the bottom. They buried them, burned them, and blew them up…but some still survived. They made roads in the dirt for them, dropped rocks and bricks on them, and let Junior have some. Some still survived. Ted started wanting the ones with electric motors, and even cleverly wired one of them up to an electrical cord one day, and plugged it into a 110 outlet. That little motor ran 1000 miles an hour til it started smoking like a bomb, and blew the fuse.

Ted and I moved on to baseball cards in 1988, and Matt started wanting spider man comic books, so one day before we moved to Elm street in 1987, I cleaned the bottom of the old toy box out one last time and put what was left in the box I found today.

After a little reflection, I decided to put them in the “keep” pile. What else could I do??